Lessons Learned the Hard Way

Lessons Learned the Hard Way

One of my favorite authors and podcasters, Glennon Doyle, often speaks of living in integrity. She defines it as ensuring your inner self and outer self are integrated. It means only having one self — there is no “who I am on the inside” and “who I am on the outside”. Dividing into two selves is disintegrated — broken.

The beauty of living in an integrated way is that you are always being *actual* you. There is no chameleon-ing to fit into different groups or settings. You show up and tell your truth. And the world can like you or not, they can show up or not, they can adjust.

This is something that has been a focus of my personal life for the past few years, but just this past week, I realized that it’s something that feels out of focus in my work life. (and lol that I thought I could feel integrated while thinking of work and life separately...)

I had a situation this week where I made a choice that was not integrated. What I did on the outside didn’t fit with who I am on the inside. When I realized this, I felt… shame. Why did I do that? And then, fear. What if doing this in an integrated way turns people off? Takes too much time? Requires too much vulnerability?

I sat with the feeling all weekend, and eventually moved from shame and fear to curiosity and accountability. And those are feelings that feel really integrated with who I am, and with who my clients are.

A Resource

I'm pretty obsessed with Slab! It's gone from being a place where I store development documentation to the place where I keep my work brain, and is quickly replacing my chaotic mess that is Google Docs. I've been using it to write out long-form instructions to clients (with embedded how-to videos and links!), gather up a simple to-do list for myself or teammate, or document SOPs. It honestly is so... simple? And there is something about that simplicity that is creating real calm.

Random Roundup

  • I've purchased five pieces from Quince over the past few months. Everything I bought has been worn multiple times and washed at least once, and I'm honestly impressed!
  • Our client Little Trouble rolled out the most adorable line of swimmies. I want to buy a pair for all of the little badass babes in my life.
  • We just launched a brand refresh and website for Mamalux. I especially love the custom illustrations on the home page — peep that little moment when the baby's hand reaches up to mama's chest. Melts me every time.

Have a great week!

Ashli